Monday, October 23, 2006


Halloween ????

I found this on one of the sites and it was interesting to learn how our Halloween first began. A little long, but might be worth the reading.

The history and origin of Halloween lie way back in centuries in the ancient Celtic New Year's festival, Samhain.
Halloween: History and Origin
Sean Carter
Halloween is that time of the year that's absolutely freakish and screamingly fun. A time when the line between the world of the living and the world of the dead is the thinnest and you're sure to feel the freak and scare with ghosts, goblins, witches and werewolves prowling all around -- both in their selves and in costumes. Halloween is an occasion to let loose the naughtier sides in you --playing pranks, sprucing up in freaky costumes and scaring the wits out of your folks. The chill of rib-tickling thrill, a nip of spine-chilling jitters and a good fare of full-blooded scare is at the heart of Halloween celebrations.

Now today's Halloween isn't the same as it was 2000 years ago. The history and origin of Halloween lie way back in centuries in the ancient Celtic New Year's festival, Samhain. So much so that the customs of today's Halloween are also rooted in the ancient customs of the Celts during Samhain, which was said to mark the end of Summer. Samhain, the Celtic New Year was celebrated every year on October 31 -- the day, which the Celts believed, was a day of the rise of the dead, when the deceased would wander the land to possess earthly souls. To keep these spirits at bay, the Celts dressed up as ghouls and monsters and put out all lights in their homes. With that, they ventured out as mischievous and wayward undoers willfully wantoning peace and property. The Celtic priests or Druids also built bonfires on this day and offered sacrifices. The idea behind all these was, of course, to scare away the spirits of the dead and avoid being "possessed" ! Now if you're brainy enough, it won't be hard for you to guess that the modern tradition of wearing costumes on Halloween traces back to this ancient Celtic practice !

The sinister attitudes of the Celts on Samhain toned down over the ages to give way to the less menacing attributes of today's Halloween. The playfulness and fun side of Halloween was first brought to America by the Irish immigrants around 1840. Like for instance, the popular tradition of trick-or-treating on Halloween came from the Irish. This had been 'gifted' to the United States by the Irish immigrants who fled their country during the potato famine. The Irish celebration of Halloween or the Hallow E'en (evening of the Hallow), as it's called in Ireland, means All Hallows Eve, or the night before the 'All Hallows'. All Hallows Day is on November 1, and is also known as All Saint's Day (a day to honor all the Catholic saints). 'Hallow' is an Old English word, meaning 'saint'. November 2 is the All Soul's Day -- a day which honors all Christians who no longer live and were not saints. And the period of October 31 to November 2 is known as the Hallow Tide. Now, on All Hallows Eve or Halloween, the Irish beggars went asking for food or money from the rich. If refused, they were threatened to be destroyed by the evil spirits. And, of course, nobody wants to take a chance on Halloween. So soul-cakes or currant buns and candy bags chockablock with goodies were kept ready for the Halloween Day.

Sean Carter writes on holidays, events and celebrations around the world. He also writes on family, relationships, womens issues birthdays, inspiration, religion, love and friendship. He is a writer with special interest in ecard industry. He writes for

Friday, October 20, 2006


I was Tagged by Walker

Hi Walker, here goes.....

Something noone else should know?
This is a hard one because I am more like an open book, I don`t make up excuses for my actions. I admit when I am wrong. I always felt that to be a good parent you must first set a good example yourself. The only thing I can think of is that I once came close to having an accident that would have been partly my fault. I was parked on a side street by our local Hospital. When I came out to get into my car and head home, some fellow had left his car part way out into the road. I had no way to locate him, and my young kids would be coming home from school soon. I needed to be there when they came home. It had snowed all night and the roads were slippery. I knew I would have to drive up onto the bank a ways inorder to keep from hitting that car. It was a one-way street with no driveways I could have backed into even if I had dared go down the wrong way. To be safer, I took the small blanket from my car and laid it over the car door and wrapped it around the door handle of the other car.Three Student Nurses came out to tell me he left his car in the road all the time and had caused 2 accidents that they had already witnessed. They also told me they would go to court with me If I needed them. Some older felllow and his wife then showed up and said he would drive my car past the other car. My car slid and just lightly touched the blanket, but thank God there was no mark or damage so i never reported it.

Two colors I will never wear?
There is a green color that I would never wear because it reminded me of the bile color some patients tossed up after an op. . Held that small pan for them way too many times. the only other color i can think of is I don`t hate orange, but still never wear it.

Three things I love to eat:
BBQ spare ribs
Dressing ( not crazy for turkey, but love the dressing cooked in it)
Fudge or Brownies ( gee, now I getting hingry for them-- haven`t made either one in a very long time. Guess I`m too afraid I would eat too many and gain more weight. HaaHaa.)

Four things i would never serve a guest:
choc. covered ants or flies ( guess this is two things)
head cheese (after hearing how it is made)
food that wasn`t freshly cooked that day.

Five things i forget to buy at the grocery store:
always forgetting to pick up
waxed paper
hotdog rolls
reg. white bread for company

Six things I like about Autumn:
changing color of the leaves,
fresh smell after a rain
working outside in the fresh air
walking thru the woods and watching the birds, animals and late flowers

Seven things I value about my family:
Knowing they are willing to help each other in times of need.Even when they are angry with each other, they still jump to help when they see that person needs them.
The trusting way they share their feelings for each other
The way they can trust each other with their secrets
The way they look out for and protect each other
The way they keep a promise once they make it.
How they don`t try to get out of a jam by blaming someone else.

And the way they are there for me if and whenever they think I need their help.

Eight things I watch on TV:
Everyone loves Raymond
Upstairs/Downstairs and the Half hour one with the clothing store, plus the other short one with the silly lady and her husband- can`t think of the names right now -- good for a laugh at times.
Movies on "Life " time station ( I especially like the true stories).
Weather station
CSPAN News station to catch up on whats being discussed by Congress.
Ghost Whisperer
Daytime Soaps, Soaps, Soaps.

Nine things I loved about school:
Actually I always liked school.
Gym and sports- was on a baseball team that our coach handled after school, but wasn`t actually a school ran like the boys teams. But we did play other schools. Belonged to the Ticket Please Club- so saw all the home game for free. Was in all the intrameral gym doings that were put on for the school and public to watch. Many times you would see me either standing on my head for a long time on the end of the formation , or the one way up on top of the human chain. Often got stuck way up on top because I only weighed 98 pounds then and it was easier both for them to hold that extra weight on their shoulders as a fourth row up, and because I was a good climber and ballanced well up high.
Loved the Mechanical Drawing and Design drawing classes.
Loved Math - Algebras, Geometry, advanced Algebra, because it was my easiest subject.
Had mostly great teachers ( one was nicknamed killer Caine and few liked her, but for some reason she like me) Actually she hated students that came from District 9 because we already knew the Science she was teaching, while the other schools didn`t. We just needed to do the experiments . She first had my older sister who was the second highest one in her grad class. Then when an older bro started High her first question was -- are you Elizabeth`s bro. When he said yes, I was told she replied "Oh, another smart allec ( not sure of her spelling for allec) number 9 student. I`m surprised he didn`t tell her there was no such word as allec in the dictionary. A couple years later I started high school and she asked if Gerald was my Bro. I held my breath as I answered yes. But after a couple months I became the one she always asked to take things to the office for her. Don`t know what changed her mind about Number 9 students, but she liked me.)
Met my first crush there, plus other nice guys that I dated.
Our Gym Teacher was great. Besides the baseball games, she also became our Senior girl Scout leader and with her we climb Mt Marcy two years in a row. She also would allow us who had to walk a couple miles to bring our lunch when she worked the gym at lunch time. Only those who rode a bus were allowed to eat lunch at school. We pratically ran home, had about 15 minutes to eat before hurring back to school so we wouldn`t show up late.
Having trouble thinking of a ninth one. Guess I can only say that I always enjoyed school right up to the day I graduated. Only hard time was back in third grade when the teacher was an older cousin. Another cousin was in the third grade with me. Sometimes we would forget and call her by her first name instead of Mrs...and she would send us to the back room where the coats were hung. After school, she would say she was sorry, but if we kept doing it all the other students would start doing it. As 8 yr olds, we didn`t care if the other kids called her by her first name as long as we didn`t get in trouble doing it. Hard calling your cousin by her first name all week-end and on monday remembering to call her Mrs so and so like she wasn`t our cousin anymore.

Ten little things I love about life:
my kids
my grandkids
my great grandkids
making things in my wood shop
knowing I can still knit and crochet even with the arthritis in my fingers
Being able to still enjoy playing my organ
Having wonderful friends- both on the net and around home.
Knowing someone was smart enough to invent special glasses with prisms built in to correct double vision so i can safely drive and keep working with all my shop tools.
Having had the privalege of finding someone who loved me and was there for me for over 50 yrs. Some never get that experience.
Knowing I am loved by my family. Another nice thing was yesterday -having a bro tell me I am the one member of our family that he prefers to have accompany him when he goes places. He worried I might feel dumped with him asking a nephew and his girfriend to go grocery shopping with him instead of me. This nephew and girfriend will be staying with him after his leg is removed, so he wanted to be sure to buy things they liked as she would be doing the cooking. I told him I thought that was a smart move-- to go with them this time. I told him, I wanted him to do whatever is best for him.

I have decided to Tag itisi, Annie and Hillgrandmom. Hope you haven`t already done this one.

Monday, October 16, 2006


What just happened??

Things happen that we seldom give a second thought to until they cause us to worry about what did happen or why it did happen, or what we can do to correct what happened.

Like one time Walt was taking a shower and when he turned on the water, there was this terrible loud ear piercing noise that continued as long as the water was turned on. He yelled to me the first time he heard it. It was so simple to stop it. I told him, all you have to do is shut off the water and then turn it back on and the terrible loud noise will be gone. I think he doubted it would work, but he tried it anyways. He was surprised that it worked.

Then one day while visiting my oldest brother, his wife was showing me the new changes made to their large farm house.
(This is the same farmhouse where I lived when our twins were born. We intended on buying it until the girls got so badly burned with mercuric acid and battery acid combined that was used yrs before to dehorn the bulls on the farm. I was afraid the girls might find something else as dangerous, so we bought the property where I still live today, built our home and moved from the farm. Years later my oldest bro bought it.)
To get back to the origional topic, first it was taking a ride on the newly added elevator that was added to take my bro from the main floor up to the bedrooms and playroom ( also used for New Year parties with the antique juke box that still worked, the pool table, the piano, the two pinball machines, tables and chairs, etc.). Then she showed me the new shower off their bedroom with the built in seat for my bro.
(I should explain that this bro had a stroke a few years ago that put limits on the control in the right side of his body and he mostly uses a wheelchair to get around.)
Well, my sis-in-law asked me if I knew anyway to fix the shower curtain so the water wouldn`t spray out onto the bedroom floor. Another simple solutation. I told her to just put some water down that shower stall side where the curtain hit it and then just press down the curtain and it would stick to the wet side of the shower wall and remain there as long as noone pushed on it. Another problem solved so easily.

Then there was the time my Husbands niece was baby sitting for the family that used to live across the road from us. She had walked the two kids to the store and when she came back she found the back sliding door partly opened. She got scared and came over after me to check out the house before her and the kids went back inside. So, I went and looked all over the main floor- similar to a ranch style with no upstairs. Nothing looked moved, not even that huge jar filled with coins that was sitting on the kitchen counter in plain view. Next it was down cellar I went. The family had just bought a new furnace and that huge empty box along with lots of smaller boxes sat around the cellar. So large that anyone could easily have hidden behind them. Before going on down, I told the niece that if I wasn`t back upstairs in 5 minutes, for her take the kids across the road to my house and to call the police. I had known there was a robbery over there a week before and didn`t want to put Walt`s niece or the 2 little kids lifes in danger. After checking behind the boxes and the furnace, I noticed the closed section in the other cellar corner. I then remembered that the older couple who had first built the house had added a root cellar for bringing in their garden veggies.
(The older couple told me they would just dig up the carrots and beets and other ingroundgrown veggies into the soil in that cool dry closed up section. And when they wanted some for a meal, they just went down and pulled up what they needed. I have never tried this, but it seemed to work well for them. They sold the house to move in with their son and help care for his children after his wife died. They were the type of neighbors you hate to see move,even if you do agree with their reason for moving. )
Well, here I am again wandering off from the origional subject. I held my breath as I opened that door and looked into a room so dark I couldn`t see anything. It was pitch dark like a night with no stars or moon shining. I went back upstairs for a flashlight to see with. Of course I again rechecked the whole cellar to be sure noone had been in the root cellar and snuck off into where I had already checked. Thank goodness there was noone there.
I then locked the back sliding door to be sure the lock worked. I discovered that if I kept shaking the door, eventually it would unhook and slide open a bit- just like we first found it. So, since their little dog was also outside when they got back from the store, I figured the dog must have kept jumping onto the door and he finally was the cause of it being opened. One more problem solved.

This next memory was brought back when reading in yesterdays paper
about a Friends mother passing away. This friend and her husband are also gone today. But reading about Mae`s mom brought back many memories and this is just one of them. This same mother is the grandmother to the neighbors who now live across the road from me.

There was the time we had the bad storm. I was still running the Cub Scout Pack at the time and had managed to talk another lady into helping me. Well, actually her son helped me snag her help as another Den mother. This is how it first happened. I was holding a large pack meeting with all the parents there. I was standing up front begging for some parents to help me when this one cub said " Mrs M... , my mother will help you." I never gave that poor woman a chance, I just said " Thank you very much Mrs Ruggiero. You don`t know how much it means to me to have your help." Now to get back to the day of the storm, I was on the phone talking to Mrs Ruggiero (Mae) and helping her make plans for her next weeks meeting. Walt was off on a week-end camping trip with the older Scouts which I had talked him into handling so my cubs would have a troop to go into.
(He also didn`t think he would be good at it, but after I convinced him he could do it ok, he really was a great Leader.)
Our 2 older boys were on the camping trip with their father and the oldest daughter was working nights at the GE plant and another daughter was off for the week-end with a girlfriend, so just the 2 little ones were still home with me and they were asleep. I had gone to bed when the phone rang and I didn`t turn on any lights when I got up to go into the Dining room to answer the phone. While I was talking to Mrs Ruggiero , suddenly something hit the picture window making a loud crashing sound. I checked and the window wasn`t broken, but I still needed to know what had happened outside that window. I told Mae to hang on while I went outside to see what happened. She told me "Don`t you dare go outside, I`ll wake up George and he will come up and check for you". I couldn`t see waking her husband up and having him drive to my house when it probably wasn`t anything I couldn`t handle myself. After all, he had to get up early in the morning to go to work. He drove the hosp ambulance on week-ends. So, Mae agreed, but added on that she was staying on the phone till I was back inside and if I wasn`t back in a few minutes she was still sending George up. I grabbed my flashlight and headed for the back of the house. At first I couldn`t see anything wrong out back.
I should explain that it was also pitch dark outside that night. What I finally did see was that the long eave board had come loose on the edge of the house roof and one end was still hanging onto the end of the roof by one nail. I noticed that the end of this long board ended right up above the picture window. So, when it fell, it swung inward and hit against the window.

(Thank goodness we had them put in the double thick glass a few years before when someone on one of the streets above us must have shot off a 22 shell and it made a hole thru this window. It was just before Christmas, so we figured someone was trying out either a new gun, or one they might have been selling. Walt and I were sitting in the front room watching Tv when we heard the noise of the bullet entering the room behind where we were sitting. Thank goodness the kids were sleeping that time and noone had walked thru the dining room at the time. Our insurance replaced the window glass. Since we already had the double heavy glass, they had to replace with the same type glass.
We never did find where the bullet actually came from. I know that it could have come as far away as one or two streets west of us. )

So, I went back inside to let Mae know I was ok so she could go to bed without worrying. It took me quite a while to unhook this long eave board off the end of the house and I left it laying next to the back of the house for Walt to fix when he got home. So another question answered, the strong wind and bad storm had brought down the thin long eave board-- hitting the window as it fell and causing the loud banging noise I had heard. Well, actually it was so loud that my friend Mae had heard the loud noise over the phone. If only I had turned on the dining room
light before answering the phone, I might have seen the board as it hit the window and it wouldn`t have been so scarry going outside to check.

The porch light was on the side of the house and never lit up the back of the house. Let me tell you, I changed that. I still don`t have a back porch light, but now one of the double motion lights over the garage is turned towards the back porch.To help even further, I bought one of those yard plug-ins, removed the stake that goes into the ground, then cut off the top of a large laundry detergent bottle and connected the rest of the bottle to the back of the house on the porch. The plug -in section has three plug-in places on it, I left the handle section on the bottle with just the top cut off to allow me to wind the cord of the old lead light around the opened handle. I added a covered type
plug in box to the wall and ran the plug-in cord thru that box and plugged it into a plug-in in the laundry room. The lead light was one I had bought for Walt ( plus one for my Dad at the same time) and Walt never used it. He would always grab a flashlight when checking something on the car. This lead light had just been laying around
on the bench down cellar. Now I found a helpful use for it and I could finally see my back porch area even better, but would like another motion light on the back of the house to see further.
Only one real problem, To turn on the lead light hanging there, I still must first go out onto the open back porch. Of course I could just leave that light turned on and unplug the other cord from the laundry room socket until I needed it. I just would need to move things to get to the plug in when I needed the light plugged in.
There are so many other times to think about that were sometimes a bit scarry, but I must stop for now and get some work done. So, more memories another time.

Thursday, October 12, 2006


Would you take a second look if you were a young girl?


Another Birthday has gone by.

I haven`t been in the mood for writing the past week or more. My mind was elsewhere. Oct. 3rd was my husbands birthday and my mind was in a whirl. I had planned on heading for the cemetary before the rain started, but my bro showed up. He is the bro who is having his leg removed soon. He was heading for a store and needed help once he got there. So, he asked me to ride up with him and of course I did. The next day I again rode with him to the grocery store. He rides around in the motorized cart and I simply get what he can`t reach so easily. Plus I put everything in his car for him.
I never made it to the cemetary until Monday when I also brought home the planters I had taken down both the one I made for him and the one for my parents who are burried in the same cemetary.
Being his birthday got me thinking of how we first met.My husband was a good husband and a good father. We had been married a little over 50 yrs. We first met when I started working at the Hospital. He was one of the orderlys there. He kept hitting on me from that very first night. I worked the Nurses 3-11 pm shift. He worked different shifts each week.

My first night working there, the head Nurse on the floor asked one of the maids if she would show me around the caffeteria at dinner time. I came on at 3pm and she went off at 4pm. She was going off work when it was my supper hour, so she said she would stay and eat with me. As we were standing up in front where we picked up our trays and were waiting in line to get some food, I was looking around that large room. I spied this blond handsome young fellow sitting with others at a table in the back of the room, down by the double doors. Something about his looks got to me and I asked the maid who he was. She told me his name and that he was one of the orderlys who worked there. Then after getting our food we headed towards the table section . She suddenly asked me if I would like to meet him and I said yes. Funny when I look back on it because I was always very bashful at that age and it wasn`t normal for me to have asked a stranger who another stranger was, or to agree to meet a stranger this way.
On the way towards the back of the room the maid told me that he was spoken for and the girl on the other end of the table was his girlfriend. That stopped any thoughts I may have had about him. I was never the type to come between any man and his girlfriend. I enjoyed meeting everyone at their table and by the time our dinner time was over I didn`t feel so much like a stranger at the hosp.. Later that evening while I was in our floors kitchen making an eggnog for a patient, this blond orderly came into the kitchen and helped himself to a cup of coffee. He kept bothering me while I was making the eggnog. As soon as I was finished I hurriedly left the kitchen to take the eggnog to the patient. Knowing he had a girlfriend made me try to ignore him and hurry out. I learned he was quite a flirt and that everyone seemed to like him. It might help if I explained that the floor I worked on was called the Gold Coast and it was all single rooms filled with people who had money, or acted like they did. So, they got more kitchen privileges on that floor. I found out much later on , that patients on all the floors couldn`t just ask for something special and have it made for them this way. On the other floors they were given a choice of drinks when the evening drinks were passed out. On the Gold Coast they got drinks whenever they asked for them. I made an awful lot of eggnogs.

This went on every day with him showing up on our floor and flirting with me and me trying to tell him to get lost. He would just smile, leave and show back up later in the evening when it was quiet and he wasn`t busy. Then one day as I was heading for the laundry to pick up my Uniforms I saw this older lady with this little girl ( turned out to be her grandmother). One of the laundry women asked her who the little girl was. Her reply surprised me. She said she belonged to the blond orderly. Thats when I was sure I wanted nothing to do with him. Later that evening when he showed up on my floor and again started asking me to go out with him, my answer was " I don`t date married men". He asked me where I got the idea he was married and I told him what I over heard in the laundry. He admitted that he was the Father, but said he got divorced when he came home from service and find her in their bed with another guy. I wasn`t sure if I believed him or not so he pulled out a receipt where he paid the lawyer for the Divorce. I told him that receipt could have been for anything, even for being in trouble for all I knew. Besides as far as I was concerned his girlfriend could keep him and his problems. This went on for months--with his asking and me refusing.

Then one day the girlfriend came up to me asking me why I wouldn`t date Walt and telling me he was a good fellow. I told her- maybe he is, but I don`t date other girls boyfriends. That was when she told me they were not going steady. They were just friends and just went out together when neither of them had anything better to do. Then I told her what I heard and she told me he hadn`t been married in over a year or close to two years. She also told me that when she decided to get married it would never be to someone with kids, she would have her own kids, she didn`t ever want a ready made family. So then I decided to find out if he was married or divorced. I had remembered the Lawyers name on the receipt and called him on the phone. At first the lawyer told me he couldn`t tell me info on a former client. When I told him that his client was constantly asking me out and had showed me a receipt from his office, and thats why I called him to know if he was really Divorced or not. He told me- since he showed you my receipt I can tell you- yes he is divorced.

I still kept refusing Walt`s advances till this one night when I was working with a 104 fever. The head Nurse wanted to call my parents to come and pick me up. I told her it was grocery night so my parents wouldn`t be home for hours. Then she gave me a choice-- if you let me give you a shot of Demerol and promise to go lay down in the empty room for one hour, then she wouldn`t turn me in. So, since I was only earning $18 a week and didn`t want to lose a days pay, I agreed. I spent that whole hour watching my watch. As soon as the hour was up, I went out to the nurses station. Mershon was so surprised to see me awake. Thats when she asked me if I knew what she had given me. I told her yes, a shot of Demerol. She said, no, I gave you a double dose and you should have been out like a light from it. She might as well have given me a drink of water for all the good it did. She told me she had been worrying how she was going to get me home when our shift was over. Well at least that problem was solved since I never fell asleep from taking it. I still remember asking her how to account for the two missing Demerol when I was counting up the drugs at the end of our shift. She wrote down that she dropped and broke them.
As I was walking from the hosp towards the Bus line on my way home, there was Walt again, driving slowly beside where I was walking on the sidewalk. He was begging me to get in and let him take me home. I just kept walking until another hosp worker , standing on the other side of the road , hollered to me saying " Dot, either get in the car and let him take you home, or let the poor boy go home as he has to be back on the job at 7AM in the morning. I felt foolish walking with him still asking, so I finally did get in his car and he gave me a ride home. That was our first time together and it was a half hours ride. We continued to date until over a year later we finally got married. And to think it all started when I first saw that handsome blond sitting at a table in the caffeteria and in my heart I felt he was the one for me. I guess I never did stop wishing even though I knew then he wasn`t to be mine as he was already taken. God must have been listening to my Heart, because we were made for each other. Walt was 5 years older than I was and I am now just one yr younger than he was when he passed away, 4 yrs ago.
I will always be glad I finally gave in and let him drive me home that night instead of riding the Bus .

Thursday, October 05, 2006


I was tagged by Hillgrandmom. hope this is what i was supposed to do.

I was tagged by hillgrandmom, and having a tough time trying to think of something to write about. Weird things or other things about myself??
1. Maybe some would think it weird that I do so much of my own home repairs when I have kids who would do it for me. Must admit that I prefer doing the work instead of waiting till someone is free to do it for me. I am a somewhat impatient person when I see something that needs to be done. I hate letting the job wait till it becomes an even larger harder job for me to do.

2. I get irritated when people try to start an argument. I believe everyone should have the right to their own opinion about things. I don`t believe anyone should get mad at others just because they have a different view on things. If you can`t agree, then you should agree that it is ok to disagree. If everyone agreed, what a boring world this would be. I never stand firm unless I know I am right and am afraid someone might get really hurt if things keep going. I am never afraid to admit when I am wrong. I do believe in the words "Forgive me" or "I am sorry" and I mean them when I say them.

3. I am always willing to help others as much as I am able. I find it hard to ask others for a favor. My Husband once told me that I was too independant and should start letting others do more for me. I grew up with parents that seldom asked others for a favor. They set the example for us-showing us how they did their own work and never leaned on others. But they also showed us that it wasn`t being a failure to take advice from others who knew something we didn`t. I learned that you only learn as much as you are willing to close your mouth and listen to.

4. One of my worst character traits is that I feel like I wasted a whole day from my life if I didn`t get anything accomplished. Guess that might come from raising a large family and never finding a minute to waste while they were growing up. For years we either ran a bicycle shop or a grocery store on our property while the kids were growing up. So, there was always a lot of work waiting to be done after the shop or store closed up for the night. I often was still doing washings or ironings till very late or early morning so there would be school clothes and Hubby have work clothes ready for the next day. I just never had time to learn how to just sit around all day doing nothing.

5. My Family is very important to me. It bothers me greatly any time a couple of them stop talking to one another. Glad it seldom lasts real long. I learned to stay out of it and let them settle things by themself . I found that usually works out better. Not easy to do sometimes, but I do manage.

6. I am not as happy living here alone as I was when my Husband was here with me. I guess when we have lived with the same person for over 50 years, we expect them to be here for us forever. Common sense tells us there is no such thing as forever, but our Hearts don`t use common sense. Was very hard to learn to cook for just one. Some days I don`t feel like eating and have to push myself to fix meals. Take some pills that require food with them, so do have to eat. Was real easy when I was cooking for a house full and even when I was spending hours making something special that I knew he liked to eat. His favorite sayings were either "you`re so good to me", or "Why are you so good to me". I never went to the grocery store without buying something sweet that he liked. He was a big sweet eater. I also enjoyed picking up items at the other stores that I thought he would enjoy having. It felt good having a little extra money to spend on him after all the years he worked hard to provide for us and the kids.

7. The one thing that did bother me about my husband was back in the 60`s when he kept trading new cars every year for 4 straight years in a row. The payments kept getting larger every year and harder to make, but he did start working overtime to cover the extra cost till the year our last son was born and his ex kicked out their son and we also took him in to raise. That year costs added up so much that he lost the new car and bought a cheap second hand one. It was in 1983 before we finally could afford another new car. He said he was buying the new car for me to make up for all the Birthdays and Anniversaries over the years when he couldn`t afford to buy me anything really nice. He kept his old car for driving back and forth to work. We kept the new car till it was totaled in 1994. We never again owned a brand new car. My next car was the 1990 Mazda which I am still driving today.

8. I guess you might think I was a bit superstitious when I say I hate saying anything bad about anyone. I think to myself that you never know when what you said just might be the last thing you might ever say to them and I wouldn`t want to always remember it. That probably also came from my upbringing- Don`t say anything bad about anyone that you wouldn`t want said about you. Plus- If you can`t say something nice, then don`t say anything at all.

9. I am not one who gets real angry easily. It takes an awful lot to get me really mad. I can only remember getting real angry once. I am one who will start to cry if I am furious and then you wouldn`t want to be up against me. Usually when I start getting that furious, I walk away and give myself time to cool down and then go back to handle things in a much calmer attitude. Only lost my temper once and I knew I never wanted to do it again. It was the only time I ever got into a bad fight- it was with a boy much older than I was and after that fight noone ever wanted to get into a fight with me. I wasn`t proud of beating him up even though he kept shoving me over and over because I wouldn`t get off the sidewalk while he walked by. He left crying and all my friends were backing me up saying I was right to protect myself. But, I still didn`t feel good about fighting and made up my mind never again unless someones life might depend on it. I was brought up under the same rules I raised my own children with. My Dad told us- Don`t ever come home and let me find out you started a fight, but also don`t ever come home and let me hear you just stood there and didn`t defend yourself if someone started beating on you.

10. I often have feeling before something happens in our family. Like one time I woke up very early in the morning feeling something was wrong with my oldest brother who lived in another state at the time. I just knew he was taken to the hospital for an emergency op. It was so real, but being so very early in the morning, I had to wait a few hours before I could call my mother . I asked her if she had heard from my bro and she told me his wife had called them. I said - was it about quarter to 4 this morning? She said thats what time they did the emergency appendex op on him and then she asked me how I knew. Told her I woke up knowing it. Happened again when my mother called to ask me to meet my other older bro at the hosp as they were taking my younger bro in the ambulance. Told her ok, then called her right back to tell her I wouldn`t be going as it was too late, I knew my bro had already died. Same thing when my Dad died. I knew before I was told. Guess you might call this a weird thing about me. It is often scarry when I start getting these strange feelings, especially if they are bad as they usually end up to be true.

Guess that gives you a lot about what I believe and how my up-bringing had an effect on my life. Hope this is what I was meant to do with the tag.

Now. I have no idea who would be willing to be tagged by me? Mr Haney, would you be willing? Anyone else willing?? I`m not sure who to ask as I don`t know who has already been tagged for this one.


Trip to the hospital

Subject: Trip to Hospital
Dad's pager went off, summoning him to the hospital, where he is an anesthetist. As he raced toward the hospital, a patrol car sped up behind him--lights flashing. Dad hung his stethoscope out the window to signal that he was on an emergency call. Within seconds, came the police officer's hand in response, dangling a pair of handcuffs out the window.

The above joke brought back memories of the day I went to the Hosp. to supposedly have one of my babies.
For months I had told my Dr that there were two sets of feet kicking me and first he tried to tell me they were just two feet and two hands. I told him " Dr Joe, if they are just one set of hands and one set of feet so low that I am having trouble bending my legs to climb even one step up or down the porch stairs, then what is under my ribs making it so hard for me to breath. He still insisted there was just one baby and one set of hands and feet, which sure kept me scared thru most of the nine months. Finally at one office visit I tried again to tell him there were two sets of feet kicking me. Dr Joe pointed to his head and said " Dottie, it is all up here in your head". I should mention that thru the months there was only one heartbeat the Dr could ever find. I pointed to my stomach and said " No Dr Joe, it is all right here in my stomach rather you believe me or not. I was feeling a bit irritated with him for not taking me serious.

Well, the day finally arrived- just a couple weeks early, so I wasn`t worried about being early, but what was happening was very scarry. My Husband was then working at the General Electric Co. in Schenectady which was about an hours drive from where we then lived in the old family farmhouse. My husband usually got home between 5 and 6 in the morning. Luckily it was on one of his days off that the problem occured or I would have been alone with just my 2 1/2 yr old daughter and my 7 yr old step daughter. I awoke, started to get up to head for the bathroom, but thats as far as I got when I knew something was very wrong. After flooding the floor, I hurriedly laid back on the bed, woke up Hubby and told him to call the Dr. He said he would call my mother. I again told him to call the Dr and to call my mother after. But he called my Mother , who woke up my father to bring her over. They lived in the next house down the same road a ways. Once she saw what was happening, she called back home to wake up my bro to come watch my other two kids and had my youngest sister awoke so she wouldn`t oversleep for school since she knew she wouldn`t get back home in time. So, I not only woke up Walt, but all of my family that still lived back at home.
My Mother called the Dr from our house and he told her to get me to the Hosp fast and that since he couldn`t operate he would have a surgeon and the op room ready and waiting. He also said to keep me laying down on an incline with my feet higher than my head -to slow down the slipping out cord. As most know, this cord is the babies means of oxygen and at the time I was having a very hard time breathing for myself. Walt helped me out to the car and my mother got into the back with me, while my Dad climb in the front with my Hubby. Hubby kept stalling the car. He was so nervous that he couldn`t keep the car running. We had a standard ( I still do today). Finally, my Dad told Hubby to slide over and Dad drove us to the hosp. He never stopped even once in that half hours fast ride. He held down the horn all the way and we were lucky because all the other cars allowed him thru- even thru the red lights. Back in those days, no one blew a horn and held it down unless it was an emergency and we didn`t have an ambulance in our town at the time.
My Mom kept telling my dad that he was going to be caught by the police -speeding so fast and running red lights that way. I still remember my Dad`s reply. He said " I wish they would hurry up then so they could get me there faster."
I`ll never forget how scared Walt was and how his foot kept shaking so bad he kept stalling the car. My Mother held my head in her lap and cried all the way to the hosp. I kept trying to tell her I would be ok, but actually I wasn`t sure I would live to get there and kept silently praying that God would protect my baby or babies since I still knew there were 4 sets of feet. Well, we finally arrived at the hosp. As soon as we pulled up to the emergency entrance, the door opened, a nurse yelled out asking " Is that --- she gave my last name.", my Dad yelled back "yes". Out they came pushing a stretcher and carrying oxygen. As soon as my Dad opened the back car door, the nurse connected the oxygen on me - right there in the back seat before they ever moved me out of the car and onto the stretcher. They took me straight up to a room on the 4th floor where the operating room was. They didn`t even take time to fill out any papers.
For months I was so scared what was wrong with my baby since the Dr insisted there was only one heart beat, while I knew there were two babies.

Shortly after they put me on the bed, this surgeon showed up. After examing me, he told me that if I was his patient he wouldn`t operate. He told me there was no way I could breath enough oxygen for both me and my baby. At the time I was breathing so hard for my babys sake that it was causing great pain in my chest . But, the pain wasn`t my worry, my babys life was. This Dr told me my baby wasn`t going to live and if he operated on me he would surely lose me on the table. He then said he was only operating because my Dr ordered it. Then he walked out to get the op-room ready for me.
A few minutes after he left the room, my own Dr showed up. I told him what the surgeon said and asked him if my baby was going to die. His reply was " Let me examine you first". Then he told me " The baby`s heart beat is weak, but as long as it is beating we still have hope- So Don`t you give up on me now Girl." I can still hear him saying that. That got my hopes up and I continued to fight to breath as hard as I could.

When they removed the oxygen to connect the anethesia, I went immediately unconsious and that was the last I remembered till I came to in the recovery room. My first question of course was if my baby was ok. Then the surgeon showed up to talk to me. He told me that he had lost me when they removed the oxygen and they had to work to bring me back alive before they could do the cessarrian operation. This scarred me because I thought he was leading up with the excuse for why my baby ( or babies as I still thought) didn`t make it. WOW!! was that thinking way off. Then he told me that this was the first in all his many years of Doctoring that anyone had twins without him knowing it ahead of time. He told me that both babies were taken to the nursery Dept. That was when I finally felt I could really breath free again. They kept me in the hosp for 2 full weeks, didn`t even allow me to sit up the first three days, and it was over a week before they allowed me out of bed and then was just allowed to walk from the bed to the chair a few feet from the bed. I spent Easter in the hosp that year and missed being with the girls , seeing their excitement while they searched for Easter eggs. They were staying at my oldest brothers home at the time.
The smalled baby- only 5 pounds 1 1/2 ounces was in the incubater with oxygen till he was about 5 days old ( noone told me this at the time). I never saw him till he was three days old and they kept telling me he was ok. His bro weighed 6 pounds 11 1/4 ounces and was real healthy, and they brought him in every day. Finally on the third day I started to get out of bed and was caught by a nurse who asked me where I thought I was going. I told her since they wouldn`t bring my other baby in to me, then I was going to the nursery to see what was wrong with him. The nurse helped me back under the covers saying she would bring him in for me to see that he was ok. She came back with him, pulled back the blanket, said- see he has all 5 fingers and all 5 toes and I have to hurry back to fix the milk bottles for the babies and out they went. I still hadn`t held him. All the nurses gave the same excuse. They told me that the bigger baby was always crying because he was hungry while the smaller one would lay quiet till they got back to feed him. They said they didn`t want to have the bigger baby`s stomach all upset from crying so he couldn`t eat. So. thats why they kept bringing him in . Finally, on the 5th day, I was feeling a bit better and more determined to get up and go to the nursery. They finally brought him in and left him for about a half hour to convince me he was ok. He had lost weight and was under 5 pounds by then, but gained back enough so that at the end of the two weeks he weighed an even 5 pounds and could be discharged when his bro and I were. His bro could have gone home after the first week, but the Dr felt it best to keep him there with me.
Now for a funny story that had to do with the babies. We were raising rabbits at the time and one mother rabbit was expecting. Hubby used to tell everyone that if I didn`t have as many babies as this rabbit did, he wasn`t going to bring me back home from the hosp. He was always kidding and teasing me. Well, that mother rabbit had 5 babies, but lost three of them, so she had two babies when I went to the hosp. I was still half groggy from all the meds they kept giving me when I started telling my mother that I guess Hubby was stuck bringing me home since I also had two babies. I never knew that my Mother left the room and the Dr came in while I was telling her that joke. My mother later told me the Dr got a big laugh from hearing it. My Mother also told me that Dr Joe said he felt there was something wrong and wanted to have an ex-ray to find out, but he didn`t want to have me worrying thru all the months. My Mother then told him how scared I had been for the last few months. Dr Joe said he wished he had known I was scared as he would have had the ex-rays and relieved both our minds. I told my Mother, why did he think I kept arguing so much with him about being two babies - not the one he kept insisting on.
One thing I can say is that after having over 36 needles that first week , I never even flinch thinking about getting a needle today. It got so bad that the Nurses started asking me where I wanted the next needle as they told me there wasn`t a spot that wasn`t already black and blue. Don`t think they needed to tell me that as I was feeling every spot. But, the beautiful baby sons were more than worth all I went thru. They are 51 years old today. They were the beginning of requiring ops for each new baby we had.
One more thing you might get a laugh out of. I first met my Husband when I was working as a nurse and he was an orderly at this same hosp. So we knew most of the workers who were still working there at this time. A friend who was also an orderly stopped in to the recovery room to see how I was doing. He told me that he had already gone downstairs to tell my husband that I was doing good and he had a beautiful baby girl. I then told him I had twin boys. He checked and found that a woman in the other op-room had the girl. So, he told me he would have to go back down stairs to tell my hubby that he was the father to two bouncing baby boys. To this day I still wish I could have seen my husbands face when he heard he didn`t have a girl, he had two boys. We already had the two girls at home. I know my Mom and Dad wouldn`t have cared how many there were as long as we were all going to be ok. But, I still wish I could have seen the expression on my husbands face.

Just an after note. Sassy is still coming inside and keeps putting her head under my arm making my arm jump up and down so I have to stop printing and play with her for a while. Been over a week now, so maybe things have changed and I won`t need to worry like I did last winter. Could be like Mr Haney said, could be my son coming in with her last month. That got me thinking that maybe Sassy is picking up the same scent from this son as she did from my Husband. She still acts a bit scared whenever she passes the doorway to the living room where my Husband passed away and I keep hoping that also passes in time. I did a real stupid thing a few days ago. I have some bounce fabric softener sheets for use in the dryer and I can`t use them because they start up my allergies. I read on the net that they are great to remove the wet odor of a wet dog. I was thinking that I could use them for that and they wouldn`t be a total waste of money. How stupid was that. After rubbing one bounce dryer sheet down Sassy`s back, she did smell better. But I have spent the past three days taking my allergy pills and finding it harder to breath, eyes smarting, already used up a box of kleenex, coughing and feeling lousy. If I had used my head, I would have know better than to use them. Guess I better find which of my kids uses bounce and get them out of my house.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

What I can`t do???
I know many things that I have accomplished in the past 4 years since I have had to handle my problems alone without my wonderful mate.
But I have also discovered many things that I am not able to do anymore, partly do to the injury while using a steak knife and partly due to arthritis. .
Things as simple as sewing on a snap or a button, or any sewing for that matter that I can`t do on my sewing machine. My hands can hold all those big tools to work with, but can`t hold anything small like a sewing needle.
This morning I was doing my darndest to hang on to a scrubber cloth to clean my stainless double basin kitchen sink. I dropped it so many times that it`s a wonder I didn`t give up and toss the cloth into the paper basket. I used to clean those sinks in just a couple minutes, now I spend more than a couple minutes re-picking up the cloth over and over. I am the same way when trying to hold a regular dish cloth. So, when I do dishes you can be sure my dishes are clean. I am able to hang on to those teflon scrubbers fairly well for scrubbing the newer coated pots and pans. Guess it must be the roughness of them that helps me hang on to them. So, since these scrubbers don`t scratch anything, I do all my dishes with it. So, while most people just wash their dishes, I actually scrub them clean.
Trying to wipe up spills is another fight for me. I can`t hang onto the paper towel or a cloth long enough to do the job very fast. You see, my thumb doesn`t close tight to my pointer finger on either hand, so everything slips thru them.
I bought all the boys one of those magnetic pick-up tools with the extended handle, liked it so much that I later bought one for myself. This comes in handy if I drop anything made of metal like a pin, nail, screw, nail clippers, hair clips and other small items.
Then I found I couldn`t hang on to the water/ juice pitchers to get them from the top cupboard. So I bought one of those long handled items with the open and close catches on the end and now I can use it to reach items up high and get them down for me.
Found I couldn`t crochet any more and refused to give it up. So, I found some of those extenders that can be slid onto a pencil to make it bigger around to hang on easier. Some of those had small openings and I found they fit my larger crochet needles. So I was able to start crocheting again. Can`t make those fancy beautiful Doilys anymore because they require the tiny crochet hooks and I haven`t found anything that fits them.
I also had to quit everything when I first got the double vision until the Dr ordered some prisms put into the lens in my reading glasses. With the double vision each eye sees it`s own picture and the two pictures only overlap a little. Thought my eye problems were cured when I had the cataracs removed 11 years ago. I had 20/20 perfect vision for a few years and then the problems started with the eyes not seeing together. Boy, can that ever get confusing. You see everything twice and you never are sure which picture image is the true one- the one the right eye is seeing, or the one the left eye is showing. They told me the double vision was caused by one of the minny strokes. With the prisms added to the lens of my glasses, they bring the two pictures back into one picture so I could again see clear enough to do things. I have had to change the prisms a few times over the years and again a couple months ago to keep seeing just one image with both eyes. Started out with a prism in just one lense to draw the bad eye towards the other eye. Eventually they couldn`t bring the left eye in any further, so they had to also add a prism in the good eyes side of the glasses to draw both eyes back together. Dr tells me that eventually the prisms will cause my eyes to cross and then I will need an eye operation to straighten the eyes out again. He is surprised my eyes haven`t crossed long before now. What he doesn`t know is that when I watch Tv, I usually remove the glasses, shut one eye and watch with just one eye. If that eye gets tired, I just shut that eye and use the other eye. That way the prisms in the glasses aren`t drawing on my eyes for a rest period.
Then I got those screwdrivers with the magnetic field so they hold the screws for me so I didn`t keep dropping the screws . That helped me some more.
Tying shoes is a hazzle. Walt used to say " Put your foot up here so I can tie them for you". For some reason, when he tied them they seldom came untied. After I lost him, I bought some of those elastic shoe strings, thinking I would be able to just slide my feet into the already tied shoes. One huge problem is that these shoestrings aren`t long enough to use on walking shoes or any type of sport shoe. They would just fit a pair of mens dress shoes with only a few eyelets in them. Then I bought a pair of those shoes that don`t need to be tied, but they bothered my feet. So, some days I end up tying my shoes 3 or 4 times in a day.
The worst thing was when the steak knife turned in my hand while I was separating two pieces of frozen meat. My hand only closes tight onto large knife handles. The steak knife turned in my hand and went in one side of my left small finger and out the other side. Of course I immediately pulled that knife back out of the finger, doing more damage I am sure since steak knifes have serrated blades. I yelled for my husband telling him I needed him to drive me to the hospital. He came out , took one look at the side that was showing as I held the finger under cold water using my other hand to put pressure to help stop the bleeding. Hubby said " That isn`t so bad, just pull the cut closed and add some tape till it heals." That was when I turned the finger over so he could see the other cut side. The knife had pulled the inside flesh out with it and knowing the air could kill the tissue, I immediately pushed the flesh back up inside the finger. So Walt never saw the worst. Still, he could see it looked terrible and he said " Get your coat and lets get going." When we reached the Hosp, the emergency room was packed. There was this little girl who kept coming over to talk to me. So I knew I couldn`t remove the large bath towel I had wrapped around the messed up finger. Didn`t want her to see it. The nurse kept taking people who had came in after we did thinking they were in worse shape. Finally the little girls father told her to come over and sit down and to stop bothering that nice lady. As soon as she left, I unwrapped the still bleeding finger and turned the worst side towards the window where the nurse sat. The minute she saw the finger, she came running out and told me to come with her. She sent the Dr right in. I told him there was nothing he could do to help me because I needed a surgeon. His reply was " Sounds like you know what you did". Told him, yes, I can`t move the finger at all so I knew I had cut both tendons, I had no feeling in it, so knew I had cut the nerves, and the way it kept bleeding I knew I had cut the main blood vessels in it. I told him he might as well go help others that needed help since he couldn`t do anything for me. I ended up having an operation which didn`t work very good. That led to a second op and shortly after that one my whole hand was being pulled shut. Then the Dr told me I needed to have the finger removed or I would lose the use of my whole hand.
Thats when I decided on a new Dr. This new Dr used some finger braces with screws on them and every few days he would screw the braces down further to keep pushing the other fingers back open. This took a few weeks. Then he worked on the small damaged finger. Today that finger is shaped at about a 45 degree angle- it can`t open up or close up, is frozen in that position. But, I still have the finger. It will always have that weird tender feeling as the nerves never re-connected right. Newer Dr told me it was like a lamp cord where part of the cord was still connected and part of the cord wires were frayed and still broken apart.
Even though there are so many things I can`t do that are so easy for most people to do, I still am able to enjoy a lot of things. Can do anything that doesn`t require the thumb and pointer finger to hit together as the don`t close tight enough to hold anything small. I often head next door when trying to remove the large battery from my battery powered drill to put in the charged one. The second hand op caused the cord in the center of the hand to pop up when I close up the hand and the cord pushes things out of my hand. So I often head next door and say "I need a larger hand to remove the battery". They are great about doing it for me. I can work with anything that allows my other fingers to close upon it. I also had an operation on my right hand about 20 yrs ago for ruptured tendond in the palm. That Dr told me to go back and work with some more tools and come back and see hin in another year. He told me he only does that op on mechanics and carpenters who work a lot with tools. Had the ruptured tendons repaired in the other hand when they operated for the finger.

Moral of this finger story is-- never use a steak knife to separate two pieces of meat that are frozen together. Wouldn`t have been so bad if was cut with a plain sharp knife or even a tool that has a straight blade, but the serrated blades do more damage in such a way that it is harder to repair the jagged cuts.

There are lots more that I can`t do with my crooked fingers and hands that don`t close up properly, but you get the idea. I can still enjoy playing my organ ( just not use the left hand small pinky), crochet (holding that finger up out of the way), work in my wood shop, tend my summer gardens, paint , live alone, keep up my home, and so forth. So, life isn`t all that bad. I feel so lucky compared to what some other people are going thru. Dr wants to remove my brothers leg above the knee and then we hope the osteomilitis doesn`t get active above the knee. I am much better off than he is.

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