Tuesday, March 20, 2007

 

Just remembering, Tuesday March 20, 2007

Yesterday, I came across the paper where one of my Daughters first put me on line. I remember wondering how hard it might be to learn all I would need to know to make good use of her hard earned money. I look back and am surprised how easy it was to learn. WOW, that was over 7 years ago. Time sure does fly by.

The same Christmas she put me on line, she also put in Cable for her Dad. She insisted on paying for it for the first year, but continued until her Dad passed away. Since then I have still kept both the internet and the Cable. How she managed to win that battle was easy. She gave us the money on every Holiday, Birthday and Christmas. I must admit that it did bother me. I kept telling her to keep the money, that she had better places to spend her money. She was raising her two children alone and everyone knows how expensive raising kids can be. Today she is a grandmother of 4.

Thinking of grand children and great grandchildren makes me realize how many of our grandchildren Walt never had the chance to meet. Six great grandchildren who never had the chance to meet their grandfather who would have loved them dearly. Most of the other great grandchildren were so young that they probably won`t remember him as time goes by. I was about 14 when my step-father passed away. What I remember most about him was that he had a glass eye that seemed to just keep staring at you all the time you were talking to him. If only they had invented the eye replacements that looked real, back then. I wonder if maybe they might have been able to replace his eye with a working eye. How different my memories of him might have been. The other thing I remember most was his Funeral. I had an older sister who was in High School at the time. I remember my Mother saying she shouldn`t have to lose a day of school to sit with her at the funeral Home. So, my father asked me if I would be willing to do it. How could I say anything but yes when my Dad was doing the asking. I knew how bad he felt that he couldn`t take the day off work to be with my Mom. There were sisters and brothers of my Mother there with my Grandmother, so I never could understand why Mother needed one of us kids there. My first Funeral. One I will never forget. I was the only kid there except for a few who came and left with their parents. So, there I sat with my mother, grandmother, Aunts, Uncles and some of their husbands and wives. I was expected to sit still in that chair which was right in the front row in front of the casket. I remember sitting there wishing I could get out of the room, or at least sit somewhere else so every time I looked up I wouldn`t see my grandfather laying there. Both of my real grandfathers, plus my other grandmother had passed away long before I was born. So, all I ever knew was my Mother`s Mom and her step Father.

I hope my grandchildren remember more pleasant things about their grandfather. I remember how he (Walt) often would pick up one of them and hold them on his lap while he watched TV, and the time he cut out some paper dolls for a granddaughter at one of her Birthday Parties when she was small. I remember him playing with them and joking around with them. I remember him telling them he had their nose while he had one finger poked up between two fingers and wiggling the finger. When they were little they often would feel to see if their nose was still there, or even tell their mother to make grandpa give back their nose. He once told a granddaughter, who at the time was living with us, that she couldn`t go outside as it was dark out and the monster would get her. She got so scared that I had to calm her down. I told her to shut the door or grandpa would get her because grandpa was our monster. That got her laughing and telling her Grandpa that he was the monster. He felt bad. He never thought he would scare her. He watched what he said to the little ones after that.

A few days ago my oldest daughter brought up the time her Dad cut out the paper dolls. She told me she still had the picture she took of him cutting out the paper dolls. Funny how some things remain in your memory while others which might have been even more important might be forgotten. I have a picture of him holding two of those large monkeys that came on sticks so you could make their arms and legs move. We had taken a vacation to North Carolina to visit the step-son and his wife and kids. The two granddaughters had just received the monkeys a couple days before we arrived. They showed them to their grandfather and left them on his lap. I couldn`t resist, I took the picture of the three of them with the monkeys.

After we closed the bike shop, the grandkids often showed up asking their gramp to fix something on their bikes. This made Walt feel so loved and needed. Even after he retired, kids sometimes showed up asking him to look at their bike. I remember one lad showing up at the funeral parlor with his wife. He walked over to tell me how sorry he was and said " You probably don`t remember me". Of course I did. He had been in my Cub Scouts and also in Walt`s scout troop when he was just a kid. He was so surprised that I still knew who he was and he told me he will never forget all he learned from Walt and I . It felt good to know all our hard work was appreciated and that he wanted his wife to meet me.

Last week my daughter who lived next door told me my cellar light was on. I asked her if she was making up for all the times her Dad used to tell her that. She laughed and said he also kept telling me to keep everything away from the furnace. She had some boxes packed down cellar and he was always reminding her not to put any near the furnace area. The kids were always calling to ask their father for help with something, like the furnace or pump, or car. But if it had to do with re-pairing or building, then they usually came to mother. Dad was great at helping, but he was more of a cobbler, while I was more on taking the time to do it right. Had one neighbor who once rented from us who would call Walt every time a fuse blew. He thought She was afraid to unscrew and re-screw in a new fuse. One time her little son told me his mom was waiting for Walt to get home from work as she had blown another fuse. So. I went over and changed the fuse for her. She acted mad, so then I started wondering what she was up to. I later found out that she was using the fuse problem to get him to lower the rent. I decided to bring home all the extra fuses , plus remove any old blown ones left around the cellar. I didn`t believe she was blowing any fuses at all. The next time, just before the rent was due, she again asked Walt to put in a fuse. When he got there and found no fuses, he asked me where the fuses went to. I asked the neighbor where she put the fuse she had removed. She had tossed it in the garbage. I went and took it back out, and of course when I screwed it back in, it worked fine. That was when Walt finally believed what I was telling him. He thought I was just jealous of him helping her, --he was way too trusting. After that time, she never called about a blown fuse again. But, we decided to update the electrical box with breakers because we no longer trusted her. We often noticed she was taking off with another guy while her husband worked and she was leaving her three kids alone. I kept a close watch to be sure they were alright. They were usually playing with my youngest daughter anyways. I knew it wouldn`t be long before one of her kids would tell their Dad. One time their Dad told me to come over the next night when he got home so he could pay me the rent. When he tried to give me the full amount ( before Walt lowered it), he was surprised when I gave him back some. He told me he wondered what she was doing with the extra money since he was giving her the full amount for us every ,month. Guess he started asking his kids where mommy went. They moved soon after he heard and he started buying a home for them. He hoped moving away from the one she was running with might help. Well, it wasn`t much over a year before I heard he filed for Divorce, guess she never changed. He told me once that he would support his two, but he was no longer going to support the last one that wasn`t his, he said it was time the real father supported her. I asked him if he was sure she wasn`t his, he said positive as he knew she was running before this and had an op so he couldn`t be left with more kids to raise if she ever left them. I told him that I had heard of times when the op didn`t work, so he went for another check-up. I hated seeing a little girl getting hurt if there was any possibility that he was wrong. He was a nice lad. He passed away a few years ago. His daughters and son are all grown with families of their own today.
Today, my daughter owns that house so I no longer have to handle the repairs or other expenses for that home. Walt and I had decided to leave the house to her in our Wills. She had lived there , paying us rent, for many years. With what she paid us, she could have easily boughten herself a house. I decided to give it to her before I died so she wouldn`t have any problems with the others. Rumor had it that the step-son was talking. Only responsible for my own place now. One less thing to worry about. And it is nice having family living next door to me should I ever need help.

Comments:
I just love your stories Dot. It's like I'm right there watching it all unfold.
 
Thanks Nan. I hope someday my kids, grandkids and even my great grandkids will enjoy reading them. I save them and print them off so they can know about some of their family history.
Thanks for stopping by.
 
hey Dotm:) thanks for dropping by:) would you kindly give me your email id so i can mail you off and on? the blog becomes too public and somehow i feel nice talkin to you n gettin some advice..never been close to my gmom's ever..so maybe i could pretend ur mine:)trust u enuf altho i dont know u..hope u dont mind...let me know..will b waitin, hugs C.
 
WOW, I see my first reply didn`t post for some reason. Wonder if both replies will show up after I post this one?

Hi Ceceilia, I must admit that I am a good listener, but I seldom make decisions for others. But, I would love hearing from you.
dotm@logical.net
 
yes it is lovely having family nearby isn't it? Hugs to you Dot. Hope your shoulder's doing better.
 
Thanks hillgrandmom. I have to leave off the strapping tape for a few days as I left it on more than 2 days and I am allergic to tape. So had a blister on my shoulder that broke and started bleeding when the strapping tape was removed. Should heal in a few days. I will remember to remove it after 2 days and go back to leaving it off a day in between so it shouldn`t happen again. I knew better, but it wasn`t itching, so I thought it would be ok for one more day.
Thanks for stopping by.
 
Memories are the curses and blessings we can't live without.
I remember more than i wish to somethimes.
My first funeral was a friends she was to young but she only had herself to blame.
I went to one recently of a person I have known for over 30 years and seeing her in the casket triggered a lifetime of memories from the moment i first met her until that last moment when 3 generations of offspring carried her to her to her final resting place.
Sometime the little isugnificant memories are remembered easier because the link us to a bigger more important part.
Walt making the dolls for yopur daughter was important to her not because of what he was doing but because of how close that moment brought them making their bond stronger.

Smart move giving her the house now and releasing her from any grief and taxes for that matter.

Have a nice day Dot

Oh and that guy and his wife I feel sorry for the kids but not for them.
He was willing to keep her after he found out and she would look better under a street lamp or maybe that's where he found her.
 
Hi Walker, I sure understand what you meant being soo young. While in High School I went to a funeral for a little baby. That one was one of the hardest ones of all. The baby was a sister to one of my school friends. Then there was the one for a couple other school friends who were riding double ( one on the handlebars) when they were hit by a car about a half mile from where I lived. One died at the scene and the other in the Hosp. a few days later. Lost another good school friend from a motorcycle club doings. They went over a cliff and weren`t found , hidden in the high brush, for three days. My friend held her cousin while he died in her arms. She was still holding him when they were finally found. So, I went to a lot of friends funerals before I graduated in those 4 years of high School. You never do forget them.
Right, he should have left her long before he did, but he felt his kids needed their mother. I am glad he met and married a nice woman and had some happy years before he died. He was a nice guy, a hard worker and a good father. He deserved better and so did his kids. They are all grown with kids of their own today. I hope none of them ever walks the road their mother did.
 
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