Thursday, February 23, 2006

 

Molehills turning into mountains/ Thurs. 2/23/06

Ever wonder why some people make mountains out of molehills.

For example, One day my hubby decided he would do the dishes while I was cleaning the front room rug. I kept hearing a lot of dish clatter coming from the kitchen, but I decided he would figure things out eventually. Then I suddenly remembered the day he started putting the dishes away from the dish drainer. (Wonder why they ever named the dish drying rack - "A strainer -- The only thing straining from the dishes is water. Does the fresh water need to be strained?. :) ) or is that the dish drainer?
Well, to get back to what I remembered. I saw him putting dishes into the cupboards just anywere he decided to put them. I tried to tell him that if he didn`t put them in the order where I had them, he would never get them all in. We truly would have needed more cupboards to put them away his way.
To get back to all the clatter I was hearing from the kitchen-- Hubby suddenly said " How the devil do you get all these dishes to fit in the cupboard? I knew I better stop cleaning the rug and go help him. I spent about ten minutes just removing the dishes he had put in and replacing them where they belonged. Of course - where they belonged-- meant where I had kept them neatly piled or spaced so they could all fit. After that time, Hubby finally agreed that it did matter where he placed the dishes if he intended on making them all fit.
Of course, I did tell him that I would love to put the dishes away his way. All he had to do was buy me more cupboards. HaaHaa. I am sure you already guessed the answer to that! He decided to do things my way- much cheaper of course.

Then there was the time when one of the twins decided I didn`t trust him. I had this rule that I was to know where my kids were at all times. If they asked to go to one friends home, they better be there if I needed to reach them. If they wished to leave that home for another friends home, then they were to call and tell me where they were going. I told all the kids that it was important that I be able to reach them in case of an emergency. All the other kids understood, but this one just felt I never trusted him if I needed to always know where he was.
One day an Aunt called me to say that my mother wanted me to come down home. A couple nights before that I was there and my Dad was having a terrible headache. He told me he had had loads of migraines, but none as bad as this one. I begged him to let me call the Dr, but he said no. The best I could get was his promise to call the Dr in the morning if he wasn`t feeling better. I called him the next morning and he said he felt great. He even had gone into his garage and finished repairing a friends car. This was Sunday morning. Then I received the call on Monday night. I am one of those who get feelings when something is wrong. In the pit of my stomach, I just knew that my Father had just died.
Walt ( hubby) was in the middle of a scout meeting held at a local church. I knew that one twin was an eagle Scout and registered as a substitute scout leader. So, I called around to locate him. All the other older kids were working that night . Well, he wasn`t at the house where he was supposed to be. Luckily, the parent there knew where they had gone. So, I did reach him at another friends home and told him something had happened and I needed him to come home and go to the church to replace his father so he could come home and take me to his grandparents home. When he stopped at home, I took him outside and told him what I feared was true. He was the only kid who knew. Later that evening when we got back home he told me what else had happened. His younger sister was watching our 3 yr old who was playing on the floor with her toys when she suddenly jumped up and ran to the window. He said she stood at the window looking upward and said "Roger, I just saw grampa soul going to heaven". He said it threw him as still noone but him knew what I felt had happened. This little one wasn`t even old enough to go to Sunday School, so we never did find out how she heard about souls going to heaven. Guess she also has that feeling. Sometimes it is great, but other times you wish you never had those feeling, and this was one of those times.
Well this is getting off the subject. needless to say, after that night that son never again questioned why it was so important that I know where to reach them at all times. He finally knew it had nothing to do with my not trusting him.
Then there was this one scout that I almost quit being a leader over. He was constantly ruining other kids work and for their sake I decided to call the head Leader to see if there was another Den he might be put in to see if another Den Mother might reach him. I called , was told the head one was at the Funeral home making arrangements for his Mother who had just died. I knew I couldn`t lay any problems on him then. I ended up keeping that boy the rest of the year. The following year his age moved him into the Scout troop, but he never joined it. We never saw that lad again till about 9 ot 10 yrs later . The same son who thought I didn`t trust him came into the house and told me that Timmy was sitting crying on our side porch. I told my son to go back into the back yard with the other kids and I would take care of Tim. I sat on the steps with Tim for quite a while ,with him crying on my shoulder , before he finally told me what was wrong. His invalid Mother had just died. I finally got him into the house , calmed him down and then called his Dad so they would know where he was. They had been searching everywhere for him. I asked if he could stay longer, promising to phone when he left for home. Today I am so glad I didn`t remove him from my Den. This was the only boy that I thought I had never reached in my whole 15 years of Scouting. Apparently I had reached him more than I ever knew. I am so glad I never let that molehill of inconvience turn into a mountain where I removed him. This Lad just passed away a few months ago. His family might wonder why I ended up sending money to a charity in his memory, but he is one I will never forget. A kid that many thought would end up in law trouble before he grew up, who ended up being a respected grownup.
there are many more molehills that might have becaom mountains if i had let the,m. But thats for another time.

Have you ever watched something small growing into something huge and was either able to stop it, or ended up wishing you had been able to find a way to cure the problem before it got out of hand?

Comments:
Morning/Evening Dot.

Isn't it funny how there is so much going on behind the scenes that we're not aware of? The way we affect other people can make such a difference to their lives.

Enjoyed reading your post. and yes I've seen the mountain grown into molehills so many times over the years. Sometimes it just not worth all the hoopla that can happen...like the saying goes "don't sweat the small stuff and it's all small stuff".

Course, I don't believe that saying has any room in this post, those are some heavy subjects you've covered.

have a good day :)
 
Lisa, thanks for dropping by. Yes, we never can tell how our actions might affect someone even years from now.
I agree, never worth worrying about the small stuff. If we make a big deal over the small matters, then noone is going to hear us over the real important things.
Thought you might like to know that it is 2:36 Pm in the afternoon here right now. So, now I wonder what time it is where you are.
 
so true about not knowing how our actions affect people and simply one or two words can make a perosn to decide whether to make a right turn or a left turn in life...
 
It is oh so true. Denny, Thanks for stopping by.
 
Ahhh, yes, there is always a reason for everything, we just have to be aware of what :-)

It's too easy to judge some one without knowing all the facts.

Children tend to live out bad feelings in bad ways, so to speak.

He really needed you there and you were there for him and he probably always remembered that!

Mrs Lifecruiser and mother wishes you a nice weekend :-)
 
I'm the type that tries not to worry about the little things, it's the big things I save my energy for. If I worried about every little thing I would be in the loony bin.

I wish hubby would learn that, he worries about everything, and if he doesn't have something to worry about, he finds something to worry about.

And he can often make mountains out of molehills.

Got a knack for it I guess.
 
lifelessions and lifecruiser, So true. One never truly knows what goes on in anothers home or life and listening to rumors causes much of the problems today. Our actions are often what turns a kid one way or another. They look up to older people and believe almost everything they hear them say. S.o important is what we do and say
 
Deni, I used to be a bad worry wart. But as the years went by and I saw all my kids turning into hard workers and responsible adults, and that Walt and I would be able to live comfortably on retirement, I finally realized much of my worries were for nothing-- just a waste of my time.
Today i only worry about serious things and i try to put them in proper light. Then if there is something I can do to improve things, I do it. But if there is nothing more I can do, then I accept it and usually let it go .
Walt was seldom the worrier, that responsibility was left up to me. He brought home the money and it was up to me to make it cover whatever was needed to pay. Only the once did I ever fear losing our home, and that was when I went back to work to help out. Thats what I mean by doing something to improve if possible.
I hope your Husband soon learns that worrying is bad for his health. He needs to do what he can and then put his health ahead of the rest of the worries.
Thanks for stopping by.
 
Dot

Where is my comment gone ?
I remember posting a comment in here before 8 hrs ?

Now, I won't complain about it because it is some thing small and I can't allow this anthill to grow in to a mountain.

As you said Dot, You need a little effort only to make things smoothen out before it goes out of control.

A thoughtful post.
 
Somethings just have to take a certain course I guess.
Lessons have to be learned and there are consequences to every action.
Walt found that out with something small like putting away the dishes.
Sometimes innocent eyes see what we dont and they know more than we give them credit for.
 
Thanks Jac. Gee, I peeked around and couldn`t find that other post. Guess it must have been picked up by an UFO as it crossed the ocean getting from you to me. :):)
Have a good day.
 
walker, you are so right about those innocent ears and eyes- always watching everything they see us do and usually wanting to be just like us when they grow up.
Remember when all you had to do was spell out a word and they didn`t know what you were talking about. They are loads smarter today thanks to watching Tv.
Hard trying to stay even one foot ahead of them today.
Have a nice day.
 
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